Viva Vermont! Read online

  “Oh no!” DJ shook her head and then actually replayed the message to be sure she’d heard it correctly.

  “What’s wrong?” asked Casey.

  DJ felt like her head was spinning, like she needed to grab onto something and hold on tight before she fell sideways. “Oh no!” she cried.

  “What is it?” said Rhiannon.

  “What’s going on, DJ?” demanded Eliza.

  “It’s—it’s Haley—”

  “Is she threatening you again?” asked Taylor.

  DJ dumbly shook her head.

  “What is it then?” demanded Casey.

  “Yeah,” said Taylor. “You’ve got us all in suspense now. Out with it!”

  DJ swallowed hard, still trying to get her bearings. “It’s Haley … she’s in the hospital … critical condition … she … she tried to kill herself.”

  Instantly, they were all pressing her for details. “When? How? Where? Why?”

  “I don’t know.” DJ just shook her head. “But I have a strong feeling that it’s because of me. Conner told me to come to the hospital.” And now tears began to flow. The idea of Haley—suicide—what if she hadn’t made it? It was all too much.

  The girls all gathered around her now, holding her as she cried, telling her it was going to be okay, that Haley was probably just fine. But DJ didn’t think so. She’d heard the desperate tone of Conner’s voice—like he was afraid. And when she tried his number, it went straight to voicemail. She knew that wasn’t good. Deep inside of her, she knew that this was serious. Very serious. And she knew that it had a lot to do with her. Oh, what if Haley was dead?

  20

  THE GENERAL DROPPED DJ OFF at the hospital. Even Grandmother seemed concerned. “You call and let us know how your friend is,” she said.

  As DJ rode the elevator up to CCU, she tried not to think about the fact that Haley did not consider DJ a friend—or that Haley probably hated DJ more than anyone on the planet. Or that DJ was probably the main reason behind this horrible tragedy.

  In some ways, it seemed crazy to even show up here, but on the other hand, Conner had begged her to come. If nothing else, she could comfort him. Still, as she walked down the hall she felt unsure. What if Haley’s family knew about DJ? What if Bethany or Amy were here? What would DJ say?

  “I tried to call you,” she told Conner when she located him in the waiting area outside of CCU. He got up quickly to meet her. She couldn’t help but notice Bethany and Amy, both glaring at her, as well as an older couple who looked extremely sad. DJ knew they had to be Haley’s parents. She avoided their eyes. “Is Haley—I mean, is she still …”

  “She’s still in critical condition … sleeping.”

  DJ shot up a silent thank-you prayer.

  “Let’s go over there to talk.” Conner pointed to a couple of chairs down the hall. But even as they walked, DJ could feel them all looking at her, as if their eyes were burning holes in her back. Of course, they’d blame her. Why wouldn’t they?

  “This is all my fault, isn’t it?” she said as they sat down.

  “No … not really. I mean, yes, in a weird way, I suppose it seems that way. Haley has blamed you for everything that’s gone wrong lately. Not that it makes sense. But you know about that.”

  “Has she spoken to you?” asked DJ.

  “Just barely. Mostly she just sleeps.”

  “Do you think she’ll be okay?”

  Conner sighed and shook his head. “I don’t know. The doctors can’t really say yet.”

  “What happened? How did she do it? When?”

  “Just last night. She overdosed on aspirin—”

  “On aspirin?”

  “That’s right.”

  DJ considered this. “Aspirin? That doesn’t sound too serious.”

  “That’s what I thought too … at first anyway.” Then he explained how a lot of people assume that aspirin is no big deal. “But the truth is it’s highly toxic when you take a large dose. I overheard some nurses talking about it. It sounds like they see this occasionally—like a person can write a suicide note and take an overdose of aspirin for attention, without realizing how extremely lethal it really is.”

  “So they don’t really want to die?” DJ was trying to grasp this.

  “No, it’s more like a way to get attention, you know, a really sad cry for help.”

  “Do you think that’s what Haley did?”

  “That’s what her mom told me.”

  “Oh … that is so sad.”

  “Yeah …” Conner just shook his head. DJ could tell that he felt as responsible as she did.

  “But she made it to the hospital,” said DJ. “Isn’t there a way to treat this—I mean, whatever it is?”

  “They pumped her stomach late last night … but the aspirin had already gotten into her system. It had begun to damage her kidneys and liver.”

  “Oh no …”

  “She may not recover. Haley’s dad told me that aspirin poisoning can be a slow and painful death.”

  “Oh …” Now DJ was crying again. “I just feel … like … like this is my fault.”

  “It’s not your fault, DJ. I mean, not directly. You’re involved, yes, just like I’m involved. But you need to realize that we didn’t cause this. It was Haley’s choice, not ours.”

  “I know her friends already hate me, but her parents must hate me too.”

  “No, it’s not like that. I’ve talked to them, and they sort of understand what caused this. Oh, sure, they’re in shock and they’re grieving. But they were fully aware of Haley’s OCD, and they knew she’d been acting differently lately.”

  “Apparently she’s the one who’s been texting me.”

  “I’m not surprised.”

  “Casey saw her at school.”

  “And there’s more to tell you, DJ.”

  “More?”

  “Yeah … I’d rather you hear it from me.”

  “Okay …”

  “Well, remember Dirk? He’s a friend of Garrison’s. He was up at Ashton Peak and—”

  “Oh, yeah, yeah—the short blond guy. I remember him.”

  “It seems that he and Amy had just started dating … and he called her from up there, and they were just talking, you know, and he told Amy the hot rumor about you and me—”

  “That we slept together?”

  Conner nodded solemnly.

  “But it’s a lie, Conner. We both know that. Yeah, we shared a bed, but that was it. Why does everyone act like that?”

  “We know it’s a lie, DJ, but Amy believed Dirk. And, of course, she told Haley. Later that same night, well, Haley did this.”

  “I feel kind of sick,” said DJ suddenly.

  “I know—”

  “No, I mean for real.” She shot off toward a bathroom across the hall, went straight for a stall, and waited to throw up. Her hands and knees were shaking, and her head was hot, but she felt cold all over. Still, she didn’t throw up. After a few minutes, she emerged from the stall, went to the sink, and splashed cold water on her face—just leaning over and splashing for a long time—wishing she could wash this whole thing away.

  “Are you okay?” asked a woman’s concerned voice.

  DJ looked up to see Haley’s mother—she was certain of it. The woman held out some paper towels. DJ nodded, thanked her, then dried her face.

  “This is so sad,” said DJ.

  The woman nodded. “I’m Mrs. Callahan.”

  “I know.” DJ threw the towels away. “I’m so, so sorry … about Haley.”

  “Thank you.”

  Now DJ didn’t know what more to say. Really, what did you say to the parent of a dying child?

  “I saw you swim on Friday, DJ. You did very well.” DJ frowned. “Yeah … but I beat Haley.”

  “I watched you when you went to Haley … how you shook her hand.”

  “Yeah, but …”

  “But Haley also thinks you stole her boyfriend.”

  DJ nodded.


  “Conner has explained it all to me.”

  “Everything?”

  “Yes. Even your unfortunate night in Everett Falls.”

  “We didn’t do anything, honest. I’m a Christian. I don’t do that—”

  “Conner told us that too.”

  “I’m just so worried about Haley.” DJ felt tears coming again. She grabbed a tissue to blot them. “I wish there was something I could do. I just feel so bad …”

  “Well, you said you’re a Christian, DJ. Pray for her.”

  “I have been praying. Even before this whole thing happened. I’d been praying and hoping that we could be friends again.”

  “Just for the record, Haley actually admires you a lot.”

  “She admires me?”

  “Well, she probably hates you too, but I’m sure you know that.”

  DJ felt slightly confused now. What was this woman really saying?

  “It’s just that she’d talked about you to me, DJ. From what she’d told me, I had assumed you were good friends. But then Haley is a master at hiding her feelings. She’s learned to cover her obsessions. I knew she’d been acting oddly. I suppose I should’ve put two and two together when she was praising a girl who was both her competition in the pool as well as with her ex-boyfriend.”

  “But Conner and I are just friends. We’ve tried to tell everyone—”

  “That’s not really the point, DJ. For Haley it’s all about perception. Sometimes she sees things differently than the rest of us. She takes things harder, puts more pressure on herself.”

  “Conner told me about that.”

  “But I thought she was fine. She seemed to have made a good adjustment to moving back to town; she seemed happy to be back on swim team and making new friends. I suppose I sort of let my guard down.” Now Mrs. Callahan was starting to cry.

  DJ grabbed a tissue and handed it to her. “But you can’t blame yourself.”

  She blotted her eyes and nodded, and DJ just stood there without the vaguest idea of what to do. This was all so sad … painfully sad. Why had Haley done this?

  “I hope I didn’t say too much, DJ.”

  “No, not at all.”

  “I better go check on Haley now.”

  DJ nodded. “I really meant it. I’ll keep praying for her.”

  “Maybe … if she feels up to it … maybe you could talk to her. I actually think that would help her get better.”

  DJ frowned. She wasn’t so sure. Still, maybe Haley’s mom knew best. “Okay … if you really think it’s a good idea.”

  Mrs. Callahan nodded, blew her nose, and left. DJ took in a deep breath and slowly exhaled. Feeling slightly more steady, she went out to find Conner.

  “Everything okay in there?” he asked with concern.

  “Haley’s mom is really nice.”

  “I know.”

  “Let’s call everyone we know to pray for Haley.”

  “I’ve already called the church.”

  “And I told the girls.”

  “Maybe we should go and pray too.”

  So they went to the chapel, and, kneeling down up at the front, they both bowed their heads and silently prayed.

  Two days passed without much of a change in Haley’s condition. During this time she mostly slept, although Conner said he’d had a short conversation with her on Tuesday night. But, like she’d promised Mrs. Callahan, DJ stopped by the hospital to check on Haley, and she continued to pray for her. Even if Haley didn’t respond, DJ had decided to stick it out. Sometimes she’d have to lurk in the hallway, waiting for Bethany or Amy or Haley’s parents to end their visits. Then DJ would just stand by Haley’s bed and simply talk to her. She told her how sorry she was for how things had gone and how she wanted Haley to get better and how she was praying and how she hoped they could be friends again. Sometimes it felt crazy and weird and generally hopeless, but DJ didn’t want to give up.

  By Friday, it started to look better for Haley. The prognosis had gotten more hopeful, and some of Haley’s lab tests were improving. More importantly, Haley had been awake for most of the day. Her mother left DJ a voicemail message asking her to stop by to see Haley. Suddenly, DJ wasn’t so sure. It was one thing to talk to an unconscious Haley—what would she say to her if she was awake?

  Haley’s skin looked a little less sallow. Her eyes, although they still had dark shadows beneath them, seemed a bit less sunken … though they looked somewhat lifeless. For a moment, DJ almost turned back. But when Haley saw DJ approaching, she almost seemed to brighten.

  “Hey, DJ …” Haley spoke softly.

  “Hey …” DJ smiled and moved closer to Haley’s bed. By now she was fairly used to all the tubes and machines connected to Haley. “How’s it going?”

  “Better, I guess …” Haley gave her sad little smile.

  DJ wasn’t sure what to say. “I’ve been by to see you, but you were always sleeping.”

  “That’s what Mom said.”

  “But I’ve been praying for you a lot.”

  “Thanks.”

  “I mean, I prayed for you before all this happened too. I guess I’ve been worried about you for a while, Haley.”

  “I’m surprised you don’t hate me.”

  “No.” DJ shook her head. “Of course not.”

  “But you know I was the one sending you those stupid hate messages?”

  DJ waved her hand. “Hey, that’s all over with now.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “I’m sorry too.” DJ took in a long breath. “And I’m not sure that it matters, but Conner and I really are just friends. That thing about us having sex is totally bogus. I mean, if you were worried …”

  “I know. Conner told me about it.”

  “If I’d known … well, you know … that it was going to go like this … well, I wouldn’t have even gotten involved with him again. Even just as friends. I mean, it really did seem too soon. I knew you were hurting and …”

  “Look, DJ, it’s my fault that I’m here.” Haley’s voice sounded a little stronger now, like she actually believed this. “I realize that I have to take responsibility for that.”

  “Yeah …”

  “And the truth is this whole thing is pretty humiliating.”

  “Huh?”

  “I mean, it seemed like a great idea at first … but it’s not like I really thought it out too well. Look at everything I’ve put everyone, including myself, through. Pretty pathetic … and embarrassing.”

  “I guess I get that.”

  “The thing is I didn’t really, truly want to die, not even when I did it. I mean, I did feel kind of hopeless and everything. Somehow, chugging down a bottle of aspirin, well, it seemed like an answer at the time.”

  “Oh …”

  “I sort of thought that it was just aspirin, like you know—no big deal.”

  “But it is a big deal. A huge deal. I mean, you could be dead.”

  “I realize that now. Anyway, at one point, after I’d been in the hospital a couple of days and I was feeling really, really sick, I actually did want to die. Just to get it over with—for everyone’s sake.”

  DJ frowned and put her hand on Haley’s arm. “But do you still feel like that?”

  “No. I want to live now.”

  “Oh … good.” DJ smiled. “I want you to live too.”

  “I obviously still have a lot of stuff to figure out … and things I need to deal with. But I’m not ready to give up.”

  “Yeah … life is hard … I actually know that from experience. I mean, stuff happens … stuff we can’t control.” Suddenly, DJ began telling Haley about her mom’s death and her dad’s rejection. It wasn’t anything she’d planned to share, but somehow it all just spilled out.

  “I had no idea.” Haley sighed. “I thought you had this perfectly wonderful life. I mean, hey, you’re a Carter House girl.”

  DJ actually laughed now. “Well, take it from me, that is highly overrated.”

  “So … when I get
out of here, DJ, well, I hope we can be friends.”

  “Absolutely!”

  They talked awhile longer, but DJ could see that Haley was getting sleepy. “I’ll see you tomorrow,” she promised her.

  “Yeah, see ya.”

  As DJ walked through the waiting area, she noticed Bethany and Amy coming her way. She started to smile and wave to them, but they just narrowed their eyes, stepping aside to let her pass and then hurrying from her as if she might contaminate them. As they went by DJ, she heard Bethany whisper, “Poison.”

  Sure, it hurt. But DJ decided to shrug it off. Really, what did silly Bethany know? DJ felt genuinely hopeful about how it had gone with Haley just now. Why let anyone spoil that? As Grandmother liked to say, “Rome wasn’t built in a day.” DJ knew that repairing every single broken relationship wasn’t going to happen in one day either. Still, she felt that with God anything was possible. Really, what couldn’t God do? Shooting up a silent prayer, she turned around and followed Bethany and Amy back to the waiting area.

  Read chapter 1 of Lost in Las Vegas,

  Book 5 in Carter House Girls.

  “Remind me to never, ever star in another high school musical again.” Eliza sighed dramatically as she poured her coffee. It was the Sunday morning after the final performance of South Pacific and DJ suspected that Eliza was just fishing for compliments. Not that she hadn’t already gotten plenty. And last night, she’d been presented with a huge bouquet of roses. DJ knew they were from Eliza’s parents, but Eliza received them like an Oscar.

  “But what if Mr. Harper really does High School Musical in the spring?” asked Kriti with wide, dark eyes. DJ could tell by the way Kriti said this that she was hoping he would. Eliza probably was too.

  “That is so last week,” said Taylor.

  “Meaning you wouldn’t participate in it?” Eliza pushed a long strand of blonde hair over her shoulder and sat up straighter, looking directly at Taylor like this was a personal challenge.

  Taylor rolled her eyes, then reached for the fruit platter. “Meaning I don’t really want to think about it right now. Sheesh, Eliza, didn’t you just ask us to remind you never to be in another musical?”

  “Eliza is probably just trying to secure her next starring role,” said Rhiannon. Then she frowned like she hadn’t really meant it to sound like that. “And why shouldn’t she?” she added quickly. “Eliza was absolutely fantastic as Nurse Nellie. Everyone said so.”